Sometimes I dream
that I'm a giant,
and all the tiny, wonderful
townspeople love me.
But I always, eventually,
wake myself up,
with all the screaming
& yelling from the townspeople
as I stomp on them 

 - c.f.

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That SOUND Dirty ??
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Ascot
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Asinine
Pound Town
(Oops that one
IS dirty)
Preheat The Oven
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Van De Kamp's Early
Unfavorable Recipes
Pork And Sticks
Pork And Strings
Pork And Greens
Pork And Jeans






Things that SOUND dirty ??

Reindeer Games
Snow Balls
Whitey Bulger
Frigate
Lay-Away
Balmy
Tail Meat
Pole Climber
BonusHigh & Tight
Wood Polish
Shower Head
Community Dump
Dicker
Do It Yourself
Low Blow
Damaged &/or Leaky Hose
Backhole
Mrs. Chaney Loves Dick
Captain's Log
Outta' Whack



.

 

Shouldn't Matrimony
be called
Mattressmony ? - c.f.

I was thinkin'... Why aren't the Special Olympic medals & awards
all jak'd up? ...like all twisted up, crooked, with
holes in em' & shit? - c.f.     (0115)
(...please forgive my sick humor...)





+  +  +  +

Sponsors
041818

This Week's
Curt's List Is
Sponsored By
Bubba Dan's
Windshield Bug
Splatter Collages
& Close-Up
Pizza Pics
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Pollack Painting

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Saturday's Curt's List
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Failed Kraft
Macaroni Recipes
Macaroni & Bees
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Macaroni & Keys
Macaroni & Blonee

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Is Being Brought
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Densmore Pontiac's
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Celebration of
His First Week As A
Victoria's Secret
Underwear Adjuster !!
Pinch Him As
Often As You Want !!

.



Moses Sanchez Says
"Let My People Mow !!"

.

Pssssst...   hey buddy ??
...ya got any toilet paper over there ??

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That SOUND Dirty ??
Yule Log
Gay Apparel
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Dick Smothers

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Grampa always thought it was funny to hit me on the way home from school with a two-by-four as he drove past.

And even
funnier if it had rusty nails sticking out of it.

- c.f.

+  +  +  +Things that SOUND dirty??


Jactation
Hanging Out
Purple Barney
Dog Leg
Drunken, Bald Headed, Monkey Sex
Whoops That one IS dirty!!
Pork Loin
Hard Drive
Self Tapping Screw
Pickle Liquor
Ellen DeGeneres
Johnson & Johnson
Dank Skank
Wine Box
Mouthpiece
Scrubs
Playing With Your Laptop
Full Load
Pouch
Dickins
Zamboni
Idaho
Bangin' On My Backdoor
Snatch
Stuffed Beaver

Ball Washer

Long One

Titular

Low Hung

Sexy Pumps

Big Box

Titan

Heavy Package

Skid Marks

Ball Joint

Bang It Out

Meat Rub

Spicy Sausage

Finger Tight Nuts

Dungerees



+  +  +  +Mankind's Greatest BlunderSelf Destruction, & Complete Waste of TimeThroughout all of History has been the Pursuitof, Belief in, & Contribution to: Religion.- c.f.

.+  +  +  +

I always know the date's
over when I get a face
full of pepper spray



 I have a deep-seated priority to always get
my money's worth, for instance, just before I go in to get my teeth cleaned,
while I'm in the waiting room, I like to eat a mouthful of Oreo's - c.f.

~ ~ ~

How come ya never see
any Nun's w/ Babies?
.
Cannibal's LOVE
Free Toes !!
.
Born Under A Beer Sign
.
Band-Aids should look like bloody gashes

Carpet Shoes are the answer

to Tiled &/or Wooden Floors

NEVER play Cards with a man named Ace

NEVER trust a plumber whom wears rubber boots

And...
&.
NEVER, EVER Trust a Fart

 +  +  +  +

Why do I ALWAYS discover I'm out of
toilet paper when I've JUST finished taking
the Browns to the Super Bowl?? - c.f.

Things that SOUND dirty??

BJ & The Bear
Drivin' a Stick
Stud Finder
Chocolate Ho Ho's
Tight Squeeze
Succotash
Bacon Drippings
Pole Vault
The Boob Tube
Lunchbox
Turner & Hootch
Smelly Kitty
Meet The Press
Mail Slot
Shawshank
COX
Nut Bag
Potsticker
Sour Puss
COX Installer
Rusty Trombone
Jack In The Box
Woodpecker

Another Lady Gaga Victim



+  +  +  +

Ain't Nothin' Funnier

Than Stupid

- c.f.

..

..

.

= = = = = =

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OKLAHOMA

Kim Chin's Door To Door
Nick-Free Butt Shaving

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Return Sponsor:
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The Original Social Network
WALMART

Densmore Pontiac's
GUARANTEE'D Diet Plans
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Dingy Manhair's Failed Toy
PUBIC'S CUBE

The Original
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FEET

Nazi German Fast Food

Gestapo Bell

Scarpuss.+  +  +  +New Year Resolution:
SNAP INTO A SLIM GYM !!

- c.f.

+  +  +  +

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Things That
SOUND Naughty ??
Pretty Pink Dickey
Gettin' Hammered
Hairy Pianist
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Head Cheese
Dictation
Womb Broom
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IS naughty)
Peanuts
Rubber Maid
Snatch
Ball Girl

More Sponsors / 2017

Failed & Sometimes
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That SOUND Dirty ??
Mayonnaise
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Things that SOUND dirty??

Ball Gown
Coming Down My Chimney
Mount St. Mary
Pedro's Big Burrito
Colin Powell
Good Bone Health
Sweet Pea
Gomer Pyle
Heinous
Waterproof Caulk
Oral Roberts
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Big Bag of Nuts
Leave It To Beaver
Bilingual
MegaRam
Head Banger
Nancy Drew & The Hardy Boys
Pork Loins

Bent, Kinked &/or Floppy Hose

Clam Chowder





Give Pizza Chants

Things that SOUND dirty ??

Busted Hose
All-Day Sucker
Wild Beaver
5 Dollar Foot Long
Worn O-Ring
Spicey Meatballs
Hose Bag
Box Lunch
Eating at the "Y"
Wood Trim
Chicken Breasts
Scratch n Sniff
Kibbles 'n Bits
Grape Nuts
Tickle Me Elmo
Tiny Package
8" Long Screw
Lick n' Stick
Log Jam
Cookie Sheets
Strap-on Nailer
Golf Clap
Steamed Meat
Hot Checks
Cumbersome Package
Movie Buff
Swap Meet
Working With My Staff
Shower Head
Policeman's Ball

 



 Things that SOUND dirty ??


Big Boned
Low Fluids
Nice Stroke
Entry Level Position
Members Only
Layman
Sweet Lips
Squishy
Mom's Hot
Hummer Lover
Snag
Oral Roberts
Tube
Dewey Bush
How Long Can You Keep It Up?
Vacuum Bag
I Got Your Back
Low Blow
Mom's Gravy
Stocking Stuffer
North Pole
Meatpacker's Union
Chestnuts

.



Things that SOUND dirty??


Nasty Crack
Gettin' Off?
Dick Vermeil
Little Squirt
Bun Warmer
Hot Pocket
Crystal Balls
Shaved Ice
Meet in the Middle
Come From Behind
Flap Jacks
Feeling A Little Chubby
Soft Taco
Helmet Head
Six In The Morning
Gum Balls
Humpin' To Please
Nice Spread
Honey Jar
Peel My Nanner?
Creamer
Wet Muffin
Wobbly Stool
Yummy Pickle
Asbestos
Saltpeter
Download/Upload

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012318

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Is Sponsored By
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"Restoring Sax Lives
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Is Sponsored By
The Brunt of Millions
of Jokes for Decades
YO MOMMA !!

Duh??



Week of 092717

This Week's CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By

The Often Overlooked,
But Just As Important,
Cousins - To The
Fun Kid's Toy
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Disgruntled Putty
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The Following Words
That SOUND Dirty ??
Heavy Package
Outta' Plum
Skid Marks
Ball Joint
Bang It Out
Meat Rub
Spicy Sausage
Finger Tight Nuts
Dungerees

Hoobastank
Hockey Stick
Bare Naked Ladies
Knockers
Loose Dickey
Bloody Gash
Mom's Coming
Moist Taco

This Portion of CurtsList.Com
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Densmore Pontiac's Answer
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Carpet Shoes

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Jenks' Shitty Furniture BBQ
Great BBQ But The
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Road-To-Table
Restaurants
(Road Kill Delicacies)

This Portion of CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By:
The Following Words
That SOUND Dirty ??
Chicken Nuggets
Idaho
Lickety Split
Bell Ringer
Huge Manhole
Shag Carpet
Filthy Wood
Couscous

- - - - - - - -

Even Stevie Wonder Can See that 99% of the followers of
our crooked, narcissistic, lying, loud mouth, whiney little bitch, uneducated, illiterate, no-class, bullying, racist, traitor; President Mango Shitler - are crooked, narcissistic, lying,
loud mouth, whiney little bitch, no-class, uneducated, illiterate, bullying, racist, traitor enabling, idiots.

- - - - - - - -

TOP

HOME



.




TOP





+  +  +  +

Important CurtsList.Com
Sponsors

122017

This Week's
CurtsList.Com is Sponsored By
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Summertime Blues
28th Annual 17 Hr.
Find-A-Cure Telethon
Please Help Jimmy's Kids

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Wall Mart
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This Portion of CurtsList.Com
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The Following Words
That "Sound" Dirty ??
Balmy
Cheese Balls
Asparagus
Huge Pianist
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Yummy Taco
Jack's Off All Week
Nasty Crack
2 Works For You
Broke Hose
Come On Eilene

+  +  +  +

More Sponsors
041218

This Week's
Curt's List is
Sponsored By
Willie Bob Thorton's
(no relation)
2,127 Celebrity Rocker
Gig Sock Collection
(212 of em once belonged
to David Lee Roth)

Thursday's Curt's List
Is Sponsored By
Mexican Flasher
SENOR WOOD

The W.E. Portion
of Curt's List
Is Sponsored By
That Broke Dick
Universal Men's
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Is Being Brought
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New Clorox Scrubbing
Bubbles Toilet Paper
"Clean Your Pooter
& The Pot In
One Easy Step !!


New At The Mall
w/a 12,000 Sq. Ft.
Showroom
"House of Tongs"

+  +  +  +



When I go shopping at a WalMartI mean HELL-Mart
I like to put on their finest fluffy houseshoes & coziest bathrobe, get a package of  burritos & a six pack of beer.I cook the burritos in the best microwave oven I can find and then I take my time
looking at crap, eating burritos & drinking beer.
Mmmmmm...shopping...c.f.

+  +  +  +.Isn't this FASCINATING ?

.



Things that SOUND dirty??


Large Staff
Itchin' To Go
Pocket Comb
Extra Headroom
Carpet Cleaner
Sassafras
Pole Dancer
Lickety Split
Manhole
Snatch n' Grab
Ball State
Long, Dark, Shaft
Hootch
Suckin' Air
Ball Glove
Wood Polish
Squat Rack
Plumbers Putty
Pie Hole
Dark Meat
Y'all Come !
Black Angus
Love Seat
Eliza Dushku
Meats & Cheeses
Filthy Hoe
Hump Day

.

I Believe You Should Live Every Day
Like It's Your FIRST, Instead of
Like It's Your Last
- Lay in Bed all Day, Cry a Lot,
& Soil Yourself Repeatedly.
- c.f.

+  +  +  +Curt's List Has Previously Been Brought To You By A Few of The Following Important Sponsors:

This Week's CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By
Tonto Fix
Tonto & Kemosabe's
Home Repair
Service Franchises

Made .Kizer Sofa's Door-to-Door
Animal Eye-Patch Sales & Service
.Heinz  1 Thru 56 Ketchup Varieties:

# 45 - Spam Ketchup

# 22 - Bean Ketchup

# 4 - Turnip Ketchup

# 32 - Beet Ketchup"

# 11 - Cabbage Ketchup etc...

+  +  +  +

Does YOUR Workplace
Restroom Require
This Sign ???

+  +  +  +



 Sponsor's
041018
This Week's
Curt's List is
Sponsored By
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Bullitt Carwashes
- And -
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Our RV's Leak
Like Hell
Thanks To A
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The Fender "Fidget"
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Sunday's Curt's List
Is Being Brought
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Tom's
Salty Nuts

.

Jim Jowles "Kids For Coats"
Bring your slightly used & unwanted child by any Calf Lick Charities & trade that little Yard Ape
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. 
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This Month's Selection:
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Roadside Service
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Door to Door, 2 ManCivil War Squirmish
&/or Divorce Court Re-enactors.Stanley's Extra LongChild's Wig Staples.Be My ValentineStun Guns & Tasers
.
Iraqie Kellog'sHoney Bunches of Goats

.Ed Gore'sCooling Fans for Globes
.
Dildo Baggins - often overlooked& rediculed brother of unemployedhobbit actor; Bilbo, yet verysuccessful Shire round-door salesman.Sunglasses by
Squint Eastwood

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Assisted Living Communities
For Boneless Chickens
.
The New Animal PlanetHit Game Show:
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Independent Contractors Union 506 Members
Three Miniature Pigs Construction
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& Brick Home Construction

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For News That Matters
To...The Reporters??

Rance Bigguns' New
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& "Am I Done Poopin'?" App

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iPhones

Johnny Whirlpool's
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Oralfis Scaley's
Large Tupperware Containers
For All Of Your Smaller
Tupperware Containers 

GLAD

BODY BAGS

+  +  +  +

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Things That
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Gettin' Chubby
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Making Sleazy,
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LORD AMONG-US !!!

= = = = = =More Sponsors
02/14/18

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New From N. Korea
Cup of Poodles

.



Who really cares

WHAT this is?

Don't you just enjoy watching it??



~ ~ ~

Curt's List Has Previously Been Brought To You By A Few of The Following Important Sponsors

Attila the Hun
Wipes & Wet Naps

Don't be Greasy Feelin' When You
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A Clean Hun
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 Dolly's - Big Jug's
...& Containers"

 New From Quaker:

Shaquile Oatmeal

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w/ Katie Carrot

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We guarantee to get you a scooter free of charge or we'll teach you how to F'n walk!!!

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and Other Apendages That Have Been Frozen Clean Off

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House of Whacks

 Sag Harbor - Retirement Communities

------------------

Week of 112217

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That SOUND Dirty ??
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Our RV's Leak Like Hell
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121517

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The Following Words
That "Sound" Dirty...

Chestnuts
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WHEN YOUR ELECTRIC BILL GETS TOO HIGH....

 

You had me at Hell No.+  +  +  +

~ ~ ~ Sometimes I see elderly people that need my help...and I feel bad
for not doing anything...especially
after that convoy of dump trucks runs over em...- c.f.~ ~ ~.+  +  +  +When my shower gets dustymy butt gets crusty- c.f.



Why are so many people
upset with Meth Labs?
So the dogs are a little jumpy - so what?

- c.f.