Sometimes I dream
that I'm a giant,
and all the tiny, wonderful
townspeople love me.
But I always, eventually,
wake myself up,
with all the screaming
& yelling from the townspeople
as I stomp on them 

 - c.f.

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& Dirty Words
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That SOUND Dirty ??
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Unfavorable Recipes
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Things that SOUND dirty ??

Reindeer Games
Snow Balls
Whitey Bulger
Frigate
Lay-Away
Balmy
Tail Meat
Pole Climber
BonusHigh & Tight
Wood Polish
Shower Head
Community Dump
Dicker
Do It Yourself
Low Blow
Damaged &/or Leaky Hose
Backhole
Mrs. Chaney Loves Dick
Captain's Log
Outta' Whack



.

 

Shouldn't Matrimony
be called
Mattressmony ? - c.f.

I was thinkin'... Why aren't the Special Olympic medals & awards
all jak'd up? ...like all twisted up, crooked, with
holes in em' & shit? - c.f.     (0115)
(...please forgive my sick humor...)





+  +  +  +

Sponsors
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This Week's
Curt's List Is
Sponsored By
Bubba Dan's
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Splatter Collages
& Close-Up
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Densmore Pontiac's
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Victoria's Secret
Underwear Adjuster !!
Pinch Him As
Often As You Want !!

.



Moses Sanchez Says
"Let My People Mow !!"

.

Pssssst...   hey buddy ??
...ya got any toilet paper over there ??

 This Week's CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By
Bob Einstein's Theory
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That SOUND Dirty ??
Yule Log
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Mung Phelp's
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Grampa always thought it was funny to hit me on the way home from school with a two-by-four as he drove past.

And even
funnier if it had rusty nails sticking out of it.

- c.f.

+  +  +  +Things that SOUND dirty??


Jactation
Hanging Out
Purple Barney
Dog Leg
Drunken, Bald Headed, Monkey Sex
Whoops That one IS dirty!!
Pork Loin
Hard Drive
Self Tapping Screw
Pickle Liquor
Ellen DeGeneres
Johnson & Johnson
Dank Skank
Wine Box
Mouthpiece
Scrubs
Playing With Your Laptop
Full Load
Pouch
Dickins
Zamboni
Idaho
Bangin' On My Backdoor
Snatch
Stuffed Beaver

Ball Washer

Long One

Titular

Low Hung

Sexy Pumps

Big Box

Titan

Heavy Package

Skid Marks

Ball Joint

Bang It Out

Meat Rub

Spicy Sausage

Finger Tight Nuts

Dungerees



+  +  +  +Mankind's Greatest BlunderSelf Destruction, & Complete Waste of TimeThroughout all of History has been the Pursuitof, Belief in, & Contribution to: Religion.c.f.

.

RELIGION KILLS
BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
FOR CHRIST'S SAKE !!

Jeez...

+  +  +  +

I always know the date's
over when I get a face
full of pepper spray



More Sad News...
My Hot Girlfriend,
Victoria's Secret
Mannequin Gwen,
Accidentally Burned
Her Arms Off
Cooking Thanksgiving
Dinner

 I have a deep-seated priority to always get
my money's worth, for instance, just before I go in to get my teeth cleaned,
while I'm in the waiting room, I like to eat a mouthful of Oreo's - c.f.

~ ~ ~

How come ya never see
any Nun's w/ Babies?
.
Cannibal's LOVE
Free Toes !!
.
Born Under A Beer Sign
.
Band-Aids should look like bloody gashes

Carpet Shoes are the answer

to Tiled &/or Wooden Floors

NEVER play Cards with a man named Ace

NEVER trust a plumber whom wears rubber boots

And...
&.
NEVER, EVER Trust a Fart

 +  +  +  +

Why do I ALWAYS discover I'm out of
toilet paper when I've JUST finished taking
the Browns to the Super Bowl?? - c.f.

Things that SOUND dirty??

BJ & The Bear
Drivin' a Stick
Stud Finder
Chocolate Ho Ho's
Tight Squeeze
Succotash
Bacon Drippings
Pole Vault
The Boob Tube
Lunchbox
Turner & Hootch
Smelly Kitty
Meet The Press
Mail Slot
Shawshank
COX
Nut Bag
Potsticker
Sour Puss
COX Installer
Rusty Trombone
Jack In The Box
Woodpecker

Another Lady Gaga Victim



+  +  +  +

Ain't Nothin' Funnier

Than Stupid

- c.f.

..

..

.

= = = = = =

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OKLAHOMA

Kim Chin's Door To Door
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Beau Mar's Touring
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Return Sponsor:
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Dingy Manhair's Failed Toy
PUBIC'S CUBE

The Original
Hybrid Transport System
FEET

Nazi German Fast Food

Gestapo Bell

Scarpuss.+  +  +  +New Year Resolution:
SNAP INTO A SLIM GYM !!

- c.f.

+  +  +  +

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020718

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Is Being Brought To You
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Things That
SOUND Naughty ??
Pretty Pink Dickey
Gettin' Hammered
Hairy Pianist
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Head Cheese
Dictation
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Peanuts
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Snatch
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Failed & Sometimes
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That SOUND Dirty ??
Mayonnaise
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Things that SOUND dirty??

Ball Gown
Coming Down My Chimney
Mount St. Mary
Pedro's Big Burrito
Colin Powell
Good Bone Health
Sweet Pea
Gomer Pyle
Heinous
Waterproof Caulk
Oral Roberts
Discoveryland
Gap Panties
Big Bag of Nuts
Leave It To Beaver
Bilingual
MegaRam
Head Banger
Nancy Drew & The Hardy Boys
Pork Loins

Bent, Kinked &/or Floppy Hose

Clam Chowder





Give Pizza Chants

Things that SOUND dirty ??

Busted Hose
All-Day Sucker
Wild Beaver
5 Dollar Foot Long
Worn O-Ring
Spicey Meatballs
Hose Bag
Box Lunch
Eating at the "Y"
Wood Trim
Chicken Breasts
Scratch n Sniff
Kibbles 'n Bits
Grape Nuts
Tickle Me Elmo
Tiny Package
8" Long Screw
Lick n' Stick
Log Jam
Cookie Sheets
Strap-on Nailer
Golf Clap
Steamed Meat
Hot Checks
Cumbersome Package
Movie Buff
Swap Meet
Working With My Staff
Shower Head
Policeman's Ball

 



 Things that SOUND dirty ??


Big Boned
Low Fluids
Nice Stroke
Entry Level Position
Members Only
Layman
Sweet Lips
Squishy
Mom's Hot
Hummer Lover
Snag
Oral Roberts
Tube
Dewey Bush
How Long Can You Keep It Up?
Vacuum Bag
I Got Your Back
Low Blow
Mom's Gravy
Stocking Stuffer
North Pole
Meatpacker's Union
Chestnuts

 More Things
That SOUND
Naughty ??
Suck It Up
Suck It In
You Suck
Super Soaker
Party Nuts
Seersucker Suit
A Bird In The Bush
Experienced Pianist
Bobber
Smells Fishy
Pork Loins

.

===========

Ignorant, weak, religious people seem to think God is an entity, like an actual person looking over all of us.
WE are all our own God. You are your God & I am mine. God is nothing more than our own conscious.
Throughout all of history religion has achieved nothing but massive death.
And what an incredible waste of time. We've all been brainwashed as children to believe this religious hogwash, which
instills nothing more than knowing what is right & what is wrong.
If any religion was worth one shit there wouldn't be so many of them.
If you believe in anything, believe in YOURSELF.

===========

 Even More Sad News...
My Hot Girlfriend,
Victoria's Secret
Mannequin Gwen,
Was Cought
Cheating On Me
With The New
Rubbermaid Kitchen
Trash Can

Things That

SOUND Naughty??


Nasty Crack
Gettin' Off?
Dick Vermeil
Little Squirt
Bun Warmer
Hot Pocket
Crystal Balls
Shaved Ice
Meet in the Middle
Come From Behind
Flap Jacks
Feeling A Little Chubby
Soft Taco
Helmet Head
Six In The Morning
Gum Balls
Humpin' To Please
Nice Spread
Honey Jar
Peel My Nanner?
Creamer

Jack's Off All Week
Wet Muffin
Wobbly Stool
Yummy Pickle
Asbestos
Saltpeter
Download/Upload

More Sponsors

012318

This Week's CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By
Eddie Mooney's Sax Repair
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"Restoring Sax Lives
Is What We Do !!"

The W.E. Portion
of CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By
The Brunt of Millions
of Jokes for Decades
YO MOMMA !!

Duh??



Week of 092717

This Week's CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By

The Often Overlooked,
But Just As Important,
Cousins - To The
Fun Kid's Toy
Stupid Putty
Disgruntled Putty
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Listless & Lethargic Putty

This Week's CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By
The Original
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This Portion of CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By
The Following Words
That SOUND Dirty ??
Heavy Package
Outta' Plum
Skid Marks
Ball Joint
Bang It Out
Meat Rub
Spicy Sausage
Finger Tight Nuts
Dungerees

Hoobastank
Hockey Stick
Bare Naked Ladies
Knockers
Loose Dickey
Bloody Gash
Mom's Coming
Moist Taco

This Portion of CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By
Densmore Pontiac's Answer
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Carpet Shoes

This Week's CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By:
Erma's Pie Hole
Dessert-teria

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Jenks' Shitty Furniture BBQ
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Road-To-Table
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This Portion of CurtsList.Com
Is Sponsored By:
The Following Words
That SOUND Dirty ??
Chicken Nuggets
Idaho
Lickety Split
Bell Ringer
Huge Manhole
Shag Carpet
Filthy Wood
Couscous

- - - - - - - -

Even Stevie Wonder Can See that 99% of the followers of
our crooked, narcissistic, lying, loud mouth, whiney little bitch, uneducated, illiterate, no-class, bullying, racist, traitor; President Mango Shitler - are crooked, narcissistic, lying,
loud mouth, whiney little bitch, no-class, uneducated, illiterate, bullying, racist, traitor enabling, idiots.

- - - - - - - -

TOP

HOME



.

More Sponsors
060518

Kemosabe Heat & Air
Tonto Blow
.
Heinz Failed
Marketing Ploys
Heinz Tomato Stuff
Heinz Tomato Goop
Heinz Tomato Squeezings
Heinz Tomato Guts
Heinz Tomato Laxative
.
Kemosabe Plumbing
Tonto Plunge
.

.




TOP





+  +  +  +

Important CurtsList.Com
Sponsors

122017

This Week's
CurtsList.Com is Sponsored By
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28th Annual 17 Hr.
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That "Sound" Dirty ??
Balmy
Cheese Balls
Asparagus
Huge Pianist
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Yummy Taco
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2 Works For You
Broke Hose
Come On Eilene

+  +  +  +

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041218

This Week's
Curt's List is
Sponsored By
Willie Bob Thorton's
(no relation)
2,127 Celebrity Rocker
Gig Sock Collection
(212 of em once belonged
to David Lee Roth)

Thursday's Curt's List
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Mexican Flasher
SENOR WOOD

The W.E. Portion
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Is Sponsored By
That Broke Dick
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New Clorox Scrubbing
Bubbles Toilet Paper
"Clean Your Pooter
& The Pot In
One Easy Step !!


New At The Mall
w/a 12,000 Sq. Ft.
Showroom
"House of Tongs"

+  +  +  +



When I go shopping at a WalMartI mean HELL-Mart
I like to put on their finest fluffy houseshoes & coziest bathrobe, get a package of  burritos & a six pack of beer.I cook the burritos in the best microwave oven I can find and then I take my time
looking at crap, eating burritos & drinking beer.
Mmmmmm...shopping...c.f.

+  +  +  +.Isn't this FASCINATING ?

.

+  +  +  +

061718

The Problem
With Supporting
Chronic Liars
Is That You
Were Probably
Lied To
First 

The W.E. Portion
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Who's Hit Blues Song
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Saturday's Curt's List
Is Being Brought
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Nuns !!
Yeah Nuns !!
I mean, who
else would wear
those stupid outfits ??

Sunday's Curt's List
Is Being Brought
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The Lack of Clothing
Girls Wear in the Summer
BLESS YOU - SUMMER !!

+  +  +  +

Densmore Pontiac's
Green Plywood
Landscaping
Sell That Mower
& Call Densmore
TODAY !!

Densmore Pontiac's
Rock Candy
Actual Rocks
Double Dipped
In Sugar

Sad News...
My Hot Girlfriend,
Victoria's Secret
Mannequin Gwen,
Accidentally Burned
Her Hands Off
Baking Cookies

Shouldn't Eye Patches
Have Eyeballs painted
on them ??

Why haven't they started
microchipping babies ??

Have you ever pooped
a turd so big that it
splashed half way
up your back ??

Things that SOUND dirty??


Large Staff
Itchin' To Go
Pocket Comb
Extra Headroom
Carpet Cleaner
Sassafras
Pole Dancer
Lickety Split
Manhole
Snatch n' Grab
Ball State
Long, Dark, Shaft
Hootch
Suckin' Air
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Wood Polish
Squat Rack
Plumbers Putty
Pie Hole
Dark Meat
Y'all Come !
Black Angus
Love Seat
Eliza Dushku
Meats & Cheeses
Filthy Hoe
Hump Day

.

I Believe You Should Live Every Day
Like It's Your FIRST, Instead of
Like It's Your Last
- Lay in Bed all Day, Cry a Lot,
& Soil Yourself Repeatedly.
- c.f.

+  +  +  +Curt's List Has Previously Been Brought To You By A Few of The Following Important Sponsors:

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Tonto Fix
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# 45 - Spam Ketchup

# 22 - Bean Ketchup

# 4 - Turnip Ketchup

# 32 - Beet Ketchup"

# 11 - Cabbage Ketchup etc...

+  +  +  +

Does YOUR Workplace
Restroom Require
This Sign ???

+  +  +  +



 Sponsor's
041018
This Week's
Curt's List is
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"Steam McClean"
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- And -
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Our RV's Leak
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Thanks To A
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Sunday's Curt's List
Is Being Brought
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Tom's
Salty Nuts

.

Jim Jowles "Kids For Coats"
Bring your slightly used & unwanted child by any Calf Lick Charities & trade that little Yard Ape
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.View Pictures of Hot Shingles in your area!
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.
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.
Dildo Baggins - often overlooked& rediculed brother of unemployedhobbit actor; Bilbo, yet verysuccessful Shire round-door salesman.Sunglasses by
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.
The New Animal PlanetHit Game Show:
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To...The Reporters??

Rance Bigguns' New
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Skeesix Mushler's
Giant, Wall Mountable
iPhones

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Oralfis Scaley's
Large Tupperware Containers
For All Of Your Smaller
Tupperware Containers 

GLAD

BODY BAGS

+  +  +  +

More Funny Stuff
010918

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Discarded
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Things That
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Hard Noodle
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Gettin' Chubby
Horizontal Drilling

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Making Sleazy,
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LORD AMONG-US !!!

= = = = = =More Sponsors
02/14/18

This Week's
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Insect Street Performer
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Ant JeMime

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"EVERYTHING INTO
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Viagra-Like Stiffy Kit:
2 Popsicle Sticks
& A Rubber Band

Sunday's Curt's List
Is Being Brought To You
In Part By
New From N. Korea
Cup of Poodles

.

More Sad News...
My Hot Girlfriend,
Victoria's Secret
Mannequin Gwen,
Accidentally Burned
Her Face Off
Roasting Weiners
While Camping

.



Who really cares

WHAT this is?

Don't you just enjoy watching it??



~ ~ ~

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You had me at Hell No.+  +  +  +

ABOUT TO TAKE

A MASSIVE DUMP!!
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I WEAR WOMENS PANTIES!!
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LOOK - HERE'S SOME SHIT I JUST COOKED!!!

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( By c.f. )
 
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01/19/18

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And On the 8'th Day

~ ~ ~ Sometimes I see elderly people that need my help...and I feel bad
for not doing anything...especially
after that convoy of dump trucks runs over em...- c.f.~ ~ ~.+  +  +  +When my shower gets dustymy butt gets crusty- c.f.



Why are so many people
upset with Meth Labs?
So the dogs are a little jumpy - so what?

- c.f.